5 Signs Your Heart is Healing After a Breakup


Take heart, for you may healthier and happier than you think – even though you’re still searching for breakup advice because your heart is broken! These five signs of healing after a breakup will give you hope and encouragement to keep moving forward.

First, a sprinkle of advice from a reader whose heart is more than halfway healed: “The key to healing your heart after a breakup is No Contact,” writes Lara on How to Break Your Addiction to a Toxic Relationship. “It is not humanly possible for anyone to grieve and move on if she is in constant contact with the ex-boyfriend or ex-husband. Impossible! You must have time to yourself…to discover who you are without the relationship, in order to heal. Otherwise healing is impossible. After my breakup, I wanted healing now! So I understand. But now that I’m at this stage of healing, I can look back and know that no contact will help heal your heart after a breakup.”

The Blossom Tip: Notice — and celebrate — even the smallest signs of healing! The process is slow, but your heart is slowly rebuilding and renewing itself. Treasure the small signs your heart is healing after a breakup, for they are more powerful than you know. 





Before you read the following signs of healing for broken hearts, think about this questions: How will you know when your heart is healed? What are the signs you’re looking for, what will tell you that you’re moving past this breakup?

5 Signs Your Broken Heart is Healing

You know your own heart better than anyone (except God). So, you’re in the best position to discern the condition of your heart. How do you know you’re healing? Pay attention to your spirit, emotions, soul, mind, and body. Notice even the smallest growth spurts and green sprouts, and celebrate the fact that you’re on your way!

Take heart, for you will be happy and healthy again.

1. You don’t feel as spiritually or emotionally empty

One of the first signs of a healing heart is your spirit. After a breakup, your spirit feels empty, lost, and confused. You may feel more alone and unloved than you’ve ever felt, more lost and abandoned than you thought possible. Your spirit is broken, your light diminished. You don’t care about anything anymore…and you might even just want your life to be over.

But, given time and a little forward momentum, you will start to feel spiritually revived again. Maybe you already feel it! You feel a little peppier, a little more hopeful. Bursts of laughter escape your lips more often — each less surprising than the last, because you feel yourself coming back together. You find yourself feeling grateful to God for the little things. You’re starting to feel like yourself again, and it feels great! That’s the first sign your broken heart is healing after a breakup.

2. You’re starting to think about your future

“We need to get over the questions that focus on the past and on the pain — ‘Why did this happen to me?’ — and ask instead the question which opens doors to the future: ‘Now that this has happened, what shall I do about it?’” says Rabbi Harold Kushner in Transcending Loss: Understanding the Lifelong Impact of Grief and How to Make It Meaningful.

You know your heart is healing when you start thinking about how to move on after a breakup. You’re willing to face the pain and move through the grief, and you’re starting to think about how to actually heal. You don’t feel stuck in the pit of despair. Instead, you’re wondering how to get on with your life. Maybe you’re even getting tired of searching for signs your heart is healing after a breakup…and you’re starting to wonder what other adventures your life has in store.

If you’re still emotionally attached to your ex-boyfriend or ex-husband, read How to Get Through a Breakup When You’re Still in Love.

3. Your creative side is peeking out

People who are grieving or depressed don’t have creative energy. They can’t come up with exciting new plans at work, or interesting new twists on mundane assignments at school. Grief and depression — which we often feel after a breakup — sucks the life right out of us.

Signs Your Heart is Healing After a BreakupCreativity is a sign your heart is healing after a breakup. You’re thinking about trying new recipes again, or coming up with brilliant strategies at work. You’re wondering if now is the time to start (or continue) writing the book you’ve been thinking about, or taking the trip through the Andes you’ve always dreamed of. A painting class, perhaps, or even going back to school? Those are awesome signs of healing for broken hearts.



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4. You have more physical energy

One of the most enjoyable signs of a healing broken heart is increased energy! You don’t want to hide under the covers when the alarm goes off in the morning, and you actually want to get some exercise after work or school. You feel peppier, more energetic and even happier. You find yourself participating in conversations — and even initiating get-togethers with friends and family members. Overall, your body just feels better…and so do you.

If you’re struggling to get out of bed after a breakup, read Why You Have No Energy When You’re Grieving – and How to Re-Energize.

5. Your brain is less fuzzy and dull

Grief has a way of dulling our cognitive processes and muddying our thinking. If you’re finding yourself sharper and clearer, even just a little bit, then you can celebrate! Your brain is healing and repairing itself.

Remember that our bodies are wired to heal. God created us to move through breakups, loss and grief — not to get stuck in them. He doesn’t want us to get stuck in breakup pain, or bury us in broken-hearted signs of rejection and abandonment. God wants us to be healthy, happy, and fulfilled, because that’s when we glorify Him. The happier and healthier we are, the more glory we bring to His name.

signs your broken heart is healingIf you’re struggling to get over a broken heart, read How to Let Go of Someone You Love: Powerful Secrets and Practical Tips for Healing Your Heart After a Breakup.

I wrote it to help women heal from heartbreak, and Blossom into who God created them to be.

Give your body time to heal. Pay attention to different signs your heart is healing after a breakup, and celebrate every positive step forward…even the small ones.

The Blossom Tip: Notice — and celebrate — even the smallest signs of healing! The process is slow, but your heart is slowly rebuilding and renewing itself. Treasure the small signs your heart is healing after a breakup, for they are more powerful than you know.

What do you think of these signs of healing for broken hearts? What would you add?

xo



Your comments are welcome below! I can't give advice, but I'd love to help you grow healthy, strong, and happy. Click here to get my free weekly "Blossom Tips" email.




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2 thoughts on “5 Signs Your Heart is Healing After a Breakup

  • Rebecca

    A sign for me that my heart may be healing is that while driving the othee day I found myself singing along to a song that was on the radio. Its been forever since i even turned on the radio for fear i would hear a song that reminded me of him. Now not only was my radio on, i was singing!!

  • lara

    For me it is 61 days NC with my ex MM and I am moving over to this page in celebration of the healing process.
    One I never believed would happen and still don’t many days. But truly I am moving on and awakening to so many new things! Laurie mentions these things above: spirit, emotions, soul, mind, and body and I would like to touch on the first one. Spiritually I don’t know if I feel exactly “closer” to God. (When I say God I am talking about my Higher Power, and the Great Creator but I don’t really practice any one religion in particular.) I always feel close with God and always talk with God. But I do feel our relationship has less conflict now because I feel God was trying to get my attention for a very long time about the MM I was unable to let go of. God kept telling me, “He is not good for you”. Over and over. I saw this in particular in my self tarot readings. I would ask God about this man and God would say: “NO!” “He is going to hurt you!” And then I would say back to God, “I hear you but I can’t really listen right now. Be back later……” This went on for many months.
    But the seed of course was planted in my mind that this man was not good for me. Of course he was married and that was not good for me. (I am single). But it was something deeper (interpersonally) than the obvious marriage making him unavailable, inappropriate and unethical in general. It was the characteristics of this man that were not good for me or for my life. The quality of our interactions left me feeling empty and despairing so often. But I just could not quit. I thought I could see him clearly but I could not quit participating in the damage he was causing to me. It is like I was volunteering to get hurt. Maybe I was afraid to overtly do it to myself. So I chose him? I really can not say yet what caused me to be so unable to stop “being in love” with him. Time and time he disrespected me and treated me badly. Abandoned me and ignored me. And time and time again I felt our values were actually different and that he was not honoring the important things to me. But finally finally I had enough this past Christmas.
    You would think he would be easy to leave? No, for me, it has been extremely difficult. He is familiar. He is predictable. I know what will happen. He is a link to both of my parents via his personality. And he became a part of my own very negative thinking patterns about life and part of the negativity that I was used to anyhow because it was MY OWN too.
    So easy to quit? NO NO NO . Because in quitting him I have to quit a part of me too.

    But besides the serenity prayer which I repeat daily I have been repeating one simple phrase to myself:
    “Made a choice to let go of negative thoughts”. I found this slogan quite by accident in one of my clothing drawers one morning and I have been holding onto to saying it. Little by little I have come to 61 days!
    And now each day I am finding life is not so bad at all without him. Life is not as scary as I thought without him. Life is more bearable than I thought without him. LOL. I know this might sound strange. But probably not to anyone who has left a bad relationship with a lover and with oneself!. That is the true lesson of my affair: A part of my “love” for him was his meshing with a part of me that pre-dated our relationship and a part of myself that was already sad and depressed about other things that pre-dated him and our relationship. Thus, I have had to also quit that part of ME to quit “him”. I think this is actually harder than leaving “him.”

    So he was a gift of course. A hard gift to unwrap and to keep but a gift. All relationships are gifts.
    And…
    Life turns out to have sweetness and joy everywhere. Who knew? Not me while I stayed miserable in my going nowhere affair that went on and on and off and on for years and years. And while I avoided taking risks that would make my life actually better. Those risks are very scary I will admit. I have found new “companion” called “anxiety” that often makes me feel like heart and mind are racing so fast as I try to grow and move forward! So of course I am staying close to God. I have a therapist. I have my 12 step program/s and many wonderful friends. YES. I put all those things slowly in place while I was still stuck in the affair (funny that). So when I left I was ready even though I did not think I was!
    And then I found this place!
    Being in touch with others also trying to leave an affair which has left an enormous impact on them humbles me as to the enormity of the task for some of us. And makes me feel quite useful in that I can share my story with others and hopefully help someone else out who is in the same boat. It is a way to share with others about a very taboo topic which keeps us from turning to our friends and colleagues in our own “real” lives. Because of the secretive nature of affairs, the healing is harder because we suffer in silence and in hiding. Many of us are so afraid and ashamed. Yet my affair partner brought and my affair me closer to myself and to others and to God. Imagine that.

    So from the bottom of my heart I want to say “Thank You Laurie” xxxxxoooooo for providing us with these sacred writing spaces, to share and to grieve and to HEAL together! These spaces ARE a true blessing in my life and have helped me enormously in my process to truly let go of my MM and my old negative self as well and to move forward, one day at a time. You are a role model in having been through this process yourself and coming out the other side. God Bless you Laurie! Many hugs to you and all the readers here, Lara xx00