8 Signs He Stopped Loving You

Are you picking up signals that your boyfriend’s (or husband’s) feelings have changed? These eight signs he doesn’t love you will show you how he really feels. You are worthy of being loved…and you need to know if his feelings have changed so you can start learning how to cope with whatever unfolds in your life. You are not alone.

“I don’t think my husband loves me the way he used to,” says Miriam on How to Decide What to Do About a Troubled Relationship. “He hasn’t said he doesn’t love me, but I can see the signs he doesn’t love me the way I need to be loved. He never seems to want to spend time with me, he’d rather be at work than home with me and the kids, and he doesn’t listen when I talk. I know about the love languages but this is beyond that. This isn’t just my husband and I loving in different ways, it’s clear he doesn’t love me. I know you don’t give relationship advice but can you tell me some objective signs a man doesn’t love a woman? Thank you for your help.”

The sooner you recognize and accept that he doesn’t love you, the sooner you can start coping with whatever your future brings. This is your time to get emotionally and spiritually strong, prepare yourself for an exciting and fulfilling new relationship, and know that you will fall in love with someone who can give you the love you need, want, and deserve.

You deserve to be in a healthy, happy love relationship! Remember that we accept the love we think we deserve. Are you staying with a man who doesn’t love you because you believe you don’t deserve better? Are you allowing yourself to be with a boyfriend who doesn’t have time for you because you think you’re not good or interesting enough? Sometimes we think we don’t deserve to be loved or treated with respect, and we let our boyfriends or husbands treat us badly.

Your first step is to see and accept the signs he doesn’t love you anymore. It hurts, but the truth will set you free. Your second step is to learn how to cope with change in your life – how to Blossom! Even if you stay in a relationship with your boyfriend or husband, something will change if you accept that he isn’t in love with you anymore.

8 Signs He Doesn’t Love You“Distance in a relationship can signal that trouble is being swept under the proverbial rug or that one person has checked out of the relationship,” writes Harriet Lerner in Marriage Rules: A Manual for the Married and the Coupled Up. “But distance doesn’t always mean that the state of your union is shaky. Your partner’s aloofness may simply be his way of trying to get through a difficult time.”

Before you read through these signs he doesn’t love you, remember that there is no one right way to show love in a relationship. Some men show love easily and obviously, while others are more guarded and quiet. Some couples are expressive; others value distance, time, and space in their relationship.

If you feel emotional distance in your relationship, it may not be a sign he doesn’t love you. Your boyfriend or husband may simply be less in touch with his or your feelings and emotions, and thus less likely to connect with you on an emotional level. Emotional and/or physical distance in a relationship can be a red flag, or even a sign of fear of intimacy.

That said, however, there is a difference between emotional styles and lack of love. That’s why you’re here, right? You suspect there is a lack of love in your relationship, and of course it bothers you.

You may also be scared you’ll have to learn how to live without him…which is hard.

8 Signs He Doesn’t Love You Anymore

Your first step is to bravely consider these signs he’s not in love with you anymore. Then, think about my questions at the end of this article…

Don’t be afraid of admitting that your boyfriend or husband  isn’t in love with you. Instead, be afraid of not being able to see the truth about your relationship! Be afraid of losing touch with yourself. Be afraid of not listening to the still small voice that will help you Blossom. Men come and go, but your relationship with God is the most important relationship you’ll ever have.

What’s most important is whether or not you love yourself enough to pursue a better, happier, healthier life for yourself.

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1. You’re searching for signs he doesn’t love you

You are the best judge of your relationship. You know your boyfriend or husband, you know your relationship, and you know when something isn’t right. If you’re searching for articles that will help you know if he’s in love with you, then he’s probably not loving you the way you want and need to be loved.

What brought you here – why are you searching for signs he doesn’t love you anymore? If you’re scared or anxious about facing the truth about your relationship, you are not alone. It’s painful and heartbreaking to even consider the idea that your boyfriend or husband isn’t in love with you anymore. I know that pain, and it is shattering.

Take heart. You may know deep down that his love has died, or you may be listening to other voices that aren’t helpful. It’s possible that your boyfriend or husband is in love with you, but he doesn’t know how to show his love. Or, he can’t express love the way you receive love. Read Examples of Gary Chapman’s 5 Love Languages to learn more about reading and deciphering the “signs he doesn’t love you.” It’s possible that your boyfriend or husband simply loves you differently than you want to be loved.

2. You don’t trust your boyfriend or husband

If your boyfriend or husband betrayed you – by lying or cheating on you – then you may wonder if he actually loves you.

signs he doesnt love you

signs of love

If you can’t forgive him, your intuition may be picking up on very real signs that he’ll cheat on you again. Your Spidey senses are tingling, and the still small voice is telling you that you shouldn’t trust him. Lack of trust is a warning sign that he doesn’t love you, and you need to pay attention before you suffer more heartache.

How do you Blossom if you’re in a rocky relationship? By trusting God to heal your spirit and heart. Jesus is the only source of true, deep, trustworthy love and peace. Trusting a man to fill your soul – or to “complete you” is setting yourself up for disappointment. It’s also setting your boyfriend or husband up to fail. A man will always disappoint you, because men are human. Like women, they succumb to weaknesses, temptations, selfishness, ego-driven decisions. Jesus is the only path to security, peace, grace, and joy.

If you don’t need to read the rest of my signs he doesn’t love you because you know the truth, read How to End a Relationship When You’re Scared to Be Alone.

3. He makes you feel like you’re not good enough

How do you feel when you’re around your boyfriend or husband? Do you feel heard, secure, cherished, and valued? How you feel when you’re with him is a huge sign he does or doesn’t love you. It’s not love if he makes you feel humiliated, unhappy, depressed, or terrible about yourself.

This sign he doesn’t love you can be complicated for women – like me – who are insecure. I’ve been married for almost 12 years, and it took me at least eight years of marriage to learn how to be secure in my identity in God. Knowing who I am in Christ is the single most important thing I did to improve my marriage, because I became free of fears, insecurities, and anxieties about my relationship with my husband.

The healthier you are emotionally and spiritually, the better all your relationships will be. Your peace, strength, and energy will not only help you Blossom – it affects everyone around you. If you end up with the painful truth that your boyfriend or husband isn’t in love with you anymore, you will be able to cope because you will be grounded. Whatever you are looking for won’t be found in your boyfriend, or a blog post listing signs he doesn’t love you, or even your own strength. Whatever you are looking for can only be found the the life and love of Jesus.

When you’re considering this sign he doesn’t love you (how your boyfriend or husband “makes” you feel), remain open to the possibility that your own insecurities and fears affect how you think others see you.

4. Your boyfriend or husband isolates you from your friends and family

This is a definite sign he doesn’t love you: he keeps you away from your loved ones. This is an unhealthy, dangerous routine of an abusive man. He says he loves you so much he can’t stand to share you with other people. He says your relationship is enough, that you and he don’t need anyone else.

Separation and isolation are not signs of love. They are signs of unhealthy relationships. If your boyfriend or husband wants to keep you away from people who love you, it’s one of the biggest signs he doesn’t love you.

Abusive men do everything they can to ensure their partners don’t spend time with friends or family. If your boyfriend or husband doesn’t want you to be with people who are important to you, then he isn’t loving you in a healthy way. It’s not just a sign he’s not in love with you, it’s a sign of a bad relationship. It’s a sign you need to reach out to people you love and talk about your relationship.

5. He dismisses your feelings, steals from you, degrades your body

Why are you searching for signs he doesn’t love you? Tell me below. What is he doing? Maybe your boyfriend borrows money from you without repaying (stealing). Maybe your husband tells you lies about where he’s spending his time, money, energy. Maybe your boyfriend or husband uses your physical body, intellectual property, or material possessions without giving anything in return.

Signs He Doesn't Love You Listen to that still small voice. God is always here, talking to you. He is waiting for you, loving you, and hoping you will turn back to Him. Don’t walk away from His love – for it will never change and He will never give up on you. Be honest with yourself about how your boyfriend or husband is treating you – and how he feels about you. Hold on to the fact that you were created for a purpose. God loves you deeply and would never send you signs He doesn’t love you! His outpouring of love is always present, available, strong, steady, eternal. All you have to do is accept it, enjoy it, roll around in His love for you.

Pay attention to the signs your boyfriend or husband doesn’t love you, and find ways to take care of yourself. Talk to your friends and family. Be honest about your relationship. It’s when you find out that he doesn’t love you that you need to surround yourself with the most love.

6. Your boyfriend or husband doesn’t care about your dreams

If he doesn’t encourage you to set and pursue your goals, if he doesn’t support your wildest hopes and dreams for your life, it’s a sign he doesn’t love you. If your boyfriend or husband  doesn’t want you to succeed or move forward in your life, then he’s not loving you. He’s dragging you down.

Are you and he supporting each other spiritually, emotionally, professionally, socially, personally? Do you encourage each other to take healthy risks and become more of who you are? A crucial sign of a healthy, loving relationship is compatible life and relationship goals. If you and your boyfriend or husband are working towards something together – a purpose, a common life mission – then you increase your chances of joy and happiness as a couple.

7. He lies to you – a big sign he’s not in love with you

Maybe he’s not lying when he says he wants your relationship to be different…maybe he wants to change, but he can’t. Or maybe he really is telling you lies, and maybe you keep believing him because you’re scared to be alone.

8 Signs He Doesn’t Love You – and How to Blossom

8 Signs He Doesn’t Love You

I don’t know if he’s lying to you, but I think YOU know. Sometimes we know things we don’t want to admit to ourselves. Why? Because we don’t want to be hurt, face rejection, deal with a breakup. It’s hard. You might be afraid to face the truth (even though you know deep down the truth will set you free).

I know that even though you’re scared, you’re brave. I know you’re courageous because you’re still here, reading the signs he doesn’t love you!

If your boyfriend or husband a bold-faced makes promises he never keeps, read When He Says He’ll Change – But Never Does.

8. Your boyfriend doesn’t listen to or respect you

Do you feel heard in your relationship? Does your boyfriend or husband listen when you talk, and communicate how he feels and what he thinks? This is the foundation of a healthy love relationship. Maybe this should be the first sign he loves you: your boyfriend or husband respects you, hears you, and values what you say, believe, and think.

If you suspect that he doesn’t love you, “Open a conversation about your concerns, without anger and blame and without anxiously pursuing your partner for more togetherness than he wants,” writes Dr Lerner in Marriage Rules. “You need to use both wisdom and intuition to know when you can’t comfortable live with the status quo. When you feel you can’t, it’s vital to speak up about your concerns.”

How are you feeling? Maybe you’re heartbroken and sad because you know your boyfriend or husband isn’t in love with you. Or, maybe you feel hopeful because you know he does love you! Feel free to share your thoughts with me in the comments section below. I won’t tell what you to do about a boyfriend or husband who doesn’t love you (because I don’t give advice), but you may feel happier if you share your story.

How to Let Go of Someone Who Doesn’t Love You

signs he doesn't love youIf you know deep in your heart that he isn’t in love with you and you need to move on, read How to Let Go of Someone You Love. I wrote this ebook after losing my sister; I needed help letting go so I interviewed relationship counsellors and psychologists. I learned how to break free from the past and find peace in my life.

Don’t ignore the signs he doesn’t love you. Take a deep breath, look upwards, and believe that you are worth love. Ask God how He sees you. Ask Him to show you how beautiful, smart, brave, and precious you are. Ask Him for wisdom and guidance, and for clarity in your relationships.

Do you need to make changes in your relationship and your life, or are you content to stay where you are? If you’re content to stay where you are, then you might have to pretend you never saw these signs he doesn’t love you.

May you find love and healing in your relationship. More importantly, may you reach out for the joy and peace only God can bring! Hold on tight to Jesus, for He will walk through this with you. 


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108 thoughts on “8 Signs He Stopped Loving You

  • Deborah

    I do put G of and Christ first and because of that, I can no longer continue a six – year relationship without marriage. I am 65 (once divorced)and he is 70 ( twice divorced). I have been divorced 13 years and he has been divorced 17 years. I moved out from discontent of feeling used. I had 5 relationships in a span of 7 years after my divorce before I met my current boyfriend … men who were not interested in marriage. I believe true love and commitment involves honoring a woman with marriage as it creates a sense of family, not a feeling of sin and conditional love. I am tired of living in sin. My boyfriend said he would go to a relationship counselor to see if there is a chance for us, based on his fear of marriage. He is also born Jewish and doesn’t accept Jesus as the son of God, just a wise prophet. I love this man whom has been kind, although not particularly romantic. He is funny and very smart and just want me to be happy short of marrying me. I am waiting to talk to him again after he gets some counseling insight.

  • tina

    hello i have being married for 4 years with my husband he cheated with more than 6 woman consantly until i decided to keep quite as if i dn’t see what he was doing we have 2 boys .But the problem is i don’t believe in divorce then I’ve decided to move back home with my kids because we were staying with his family.Then i met this guy after a year of separation with no support from him then i started dating the guy but when i check on facebook this guy have a baby in which he never told me about and few ladies that he posted with on facebook now I’m thinking of going back to my husband because I can see men are the same and I’ve just blocked the new guy and left him without saying anything but I miss him like crazy and now I don’t know what to do

  • Meppsa

    I feel better, I said “no” to each one of those questions, thank you! He’s a loving caring sweet man, it was wrong to be mad at him he didn’t do anything. Now the question is why am I so weepy lately? O_o;

  • Sharon

    I’ve been in a relationship with what I don’t even know to call my boyfriend. For Well over eight weeks. I’ve tried seeing Where our relationship is going by asking him. And he says we’re having a good time, I don’t know about the future I don’t want a commitment now. He’s never once complemented me ….but says he’s worried about my weight because I’m to thin, yet my doctor says I have the perfect weight .Yeah he’s over weight.
    He is a nice guy and he treats me good. I don’t want to give up on him, I don’t know what to really do with him either. WHY DO MEN PLAY THE ‘ I don’t give a crap attitude with women ?

    • Sanji

      They don’t give a crap because we accept it. If you want your man to start paying attention to you, start paying attention to yourself. Don’t mope around wondering why he doesn’t love you or why he doesn’t commit to you. Get together with your friends, like you used to. Go out for drinks. Dress up and have a good time. The fun loving person that he fell in love with may have turned into a nagging whiny crybaby. The person who he had to chase after needs to find her way back. Once the thrill of the chase is gone, usually so is the man. If I were you, I wouldn’t pretend to be the popular girl, I would BE the popular girl and enjoy my life again. You’ll probably find a guy who’s a lot nicer to you in the process of finding yourself again. And for God’s sake, don’t pretend. Do it for real. How would you treat a guy you liked but weren’t that into? Try it and watch the tables turn.

      • Sanji

        They don’t give a crap because we accept it. If you want your man to start paying attention to you, start paying attention to yourself. Don’t mope around wondering why he doesn’t love you or why he doesn’t commit to you. Get together with your friends, like you used to. Go out for drinks. Dress up and have a good time. The fun loving person that he fell in love with may have turned into a nagging whiny crybaby. The person who he had to chase after needs to find her way back. Once the thrill of the chase is gone, usually so is the man. If I were you, I wouldn’t pretend to be the popular girl, I would BE the popular girl and enjoy my life again. You’ll probably find a guy who’s a lot nicer to you in the process of finding yourself again. And for God’s sake, don’t pretend. Do it for real. How would you treat a guy you liked but weren’t that into? Try it and watch the tables turn.

        And if that’s not possible because you have children and you just can’t get away, then don’t chase him around and keep asking what’s wrong, why won’t you talk to me, or anything else that suggests you’ll die without him. You won’t. Hate to say it but if someone doesn’t love you, they don’t love you. The hardest thing is just accepting what is, being as friendly as you can for the sake of the children and living your life without chasing someone who does not want to be chased. This is about self esteem and there’s no quicker way to lose yours then to beg someone for something that they don’t want to give. Good luck to all my sisters out there whow may have forgotten that they are Queens. Act accordingly.

  • bea

    i met this guy we started hanging out not long after tet very short he introduced me to his family

    personal matters happened in my life and i then moved in and ever since his mom and sister are tryna change me there never good things they say according to them i am stubborn hard headed and ungrateful it is now to the point where it affects my kids which is not his kids. everytime i buy things there get mad i buy like clothes for my girls they make a fuss

    everything is downhill me his mom and sister dont talk his sister daughter age 16 goes to then and discuss everything i do and say to them even my 9 yr old daughter is now doing the same.

    john has no desire for me he blames me fir everything he doesnt show interest in me he doesnt text me any more yet he expect me to pack lunch for him every mornig at 05:00am his phone is always squeeky clean had had cheated and now he says but it is someone i knew and i set it up to see if he is loyal yet now he has a rash between his legs and this arose red lights. last night he said i should move out cos me and his mom and sis will never get along ever. if we hav a fight he always mentions his mom and sister he always involve them. i do laundry on saturdays his mom sometimes takes all his laundry from mine and wash his laundry. he always consults with her before he makes decisions. we have no communication. he comes hom at 19:00pm at night then i must go vath so ge can bath then he goes to his room laying on the bed on his phone and laptop expects me to warm up our supper and bring it to him in the room there he eats and leave his dirty plate and glass on the side bed cupboard. i hav stopped taking his pajamas to the bathroom and stopped taking his clothes out the cupboard. he wants me to ask what i can do with my income after i paid my rent. he refuse to move out his moms house cos he is so “brain washed” by his mom and sis that he said ge wont make it ons his own but his income is well enough to do it. i am his 7th GF and all his exes lived with him and then they move out

    who is the problem is my question

    he never helps me in the house with choires like dishes or assisr with my kids or help doing laundry

    i feel like a “nanny” or butler as he wants to be served.

    i love him but i cant go on like this i can feel i had changged i dont smile i am lately always grumpy id rather dtay at work then go home.


    • Sanji

      He’s not the problem and neither is his family. Sounds like you already know this isn’t working out. Are you staying because you can’t afford to leave? Afraid of being alone and willing to play maid to keep him around? Whatever the reason, wise up, make a plan to get out and stop wasting your good years on an unworthy person. People don’t change unless they have no choice. This man has a choice. You’re the one who seems to be stuck there.

  • Yvonne

    I have a friend that I was close to and I was hoping for more from our friendship and I think he did too . All of a sudden he’s not replying to my texts blaming his phone and we used to talk and text everyday on the phone all this had stopped . He rings me once a week as if nothing is different . What’s that all about ?we are going on a cruise next year and he’s still fine with that I’m confused .

    • Sanji

      You might be too available. There’s no thrill of the chase. Too much texting means you’re not out living your life. If you suddenly pull way back, the first thing he’ll think is that you’re out with another man. When they get too comfortable, they take advantage. Pull way back.

  • Diana Kanweri

    Am really grateful for what I have read above,
    I have this boyfriend who doesn’t make a call to see how am doing, and I don’t call him too because I want him to call first. I don’t want to feel like am the one chasing him.
    But I love him so much, he told me he loves me but I didn’t believe him. I can’t stop thinking about him. I always pray to God to make him love me like he says. Sometimes I think he’s too busy, and another heart tells me that maybe he simply doesn’t care. I don’t know what to do.

    • Sanji

      I’m curious as to what you love about someone who isn’t showing you love. Men are never too busy when they want someone. If he’s not paying you any attention it’s because he doesn’t think he has to. He knows you’re already on the hook so there’s no point in making any extra effort. I would say to treat a man who’s acting this way as though they’re going through an evaluation period. I wouldn’t let them know, but I would absolutely not give them extra attention if they’re not giving me any.

  • Heart broken

    Been married for 7 years together for 8 years have two children with him and one from previous relationships he told me many times he with me for the sake of children he calls me fat ugly I have lupus but I’m a lot better of than ppl who are worse than me he abused me so much I don’t go out he wants sex but like it when he wants he never told me he love me he scared me he earns but I didn’t get penny I never been fifty birthday or anniversary present never treated me just humiliated I been close to end it all but I realise he doesn’t love me at all as I was broken divorced with a child from previous marriage I been suffering anxiety s attack panic attack I can’t sleep we not share room for past 5 years but I’m just here to have sex I will disgusted at myself I can’t think for myself I take medication to sleep

  • Lost

    My boyfriend and I broke up for about 2 weeks. During those two weeks he was talking to another woman. I just found out when I found another phone in his car. I’m hurt that it didn’t take him long to start telling someone else that missed her. I don’t know what to do now that he has moved in with me.

  • Julie

    So here is my story. Married for 13 years together for 16 and I know my husband is in love with someone else. He has been having an off/on affair for the last two years with a former employee. Says he loves this woman like has has never loved anyone else. I knew we had big problems and I was doing my best to fix my part of them. He had however ‘checked out of the marriage at the end of 2013’. The affair was off for a few months after I discovered it and then I was diagnosed with cancer in July this year. It took 6 weeks for a full diagnosis during which time I was naturally preoccupied with my health. Around this time it sounds as though things started up again. I found out at the beginning of October that he was seeing her again when I was in another state having radiation treatment. How low can you go. Now I have to go interstate to have surgery on 15 December. I know he will probably see her during this time. I’m not an idiot and am sick of being treated with a total lack of respect. He said his number one priority is to get me through this cancer treatment. After all he has done to me, I still love him even though it’s the lowest point of my life. I pray every day for guidance and for my health. Such a tough time. My self esteem has never been so low.

  • Tiara Smith

    I fell in love with my boyfriend and we been together for 3 1/2 years but things he say and do make me feel like I wasted almost 4 years of my time. He can’t understand when I tell him something is wrong it’s only because I care but he take it as I want to be his mother rather than his girlfriend and then broke up with me and said he don’t want to talk to me, which hurts my feelings due to the fact I don’t ever think that would be serious enough to break up, but now I am getting more connected with God and myself. I realized that I am worth more than an On and off switch with a man who obviously don’t value me as the queen I am. I feel as though if you giving people good advice then you should cherish those individuals. I came to a conclusion that he is just a lost soul who can’t be told anything and brings me down when he’s mad and I don’t need that anymore.

  • Regomoditswe

    I am inlove with my boyfriend. its been two months not talking to each other.This guy were so inlove he was always telking me that I am the one who is going to leave him because he doesn’t have money and because his unlookable..I loved him for rhe way he was..he was so supporting loving and caring..everything he does he would tell me..his family wrote a lobola letter to my familt..we were about to get married..then I once had a phone call in his presence he didn’t ask me nothing we called that person who called me the person said it was a wrong number..my husband to be decided to dump me for that the very same day…its been months but I can’t forget about him..he never trusted me he would sometimes come to me without in informing still he would find me around alone…I so love him I can’t do nothing.at the moment I just want to die..I tried to call him.he blocked my calls..he doesn’t call me..he doesn’t reply my text..I just want to die.

  • Nati

    Interesting topic my situation is we’re Christians and now he wants us to be married before having sex fine but don’t have sex with me when you say that and afterwards degrade me and makes me think that you’re crazy or just say that you want pleasure as far as me giving you head and then I get no pleasure in return that’s not fair either so for a couple who has been sexual the entire relationship now all the sudden he wants that to stop because he wants to get married and I’m noticing some distance but the love is still there I’m confused if he still wants to be with me or not now he says he feels like he can’t trust me for whatever reason I don’t know and he’s making himself more distant from me so at this point I just I’m watching and taking it day-by-day to see what will happen in this relationship will we go our separate ways or will we pursue getting married

  • Rebecca

    He’s not my boyfriend yet because I’m a minor and he is an adult . Soon very soon enough I’ll be legal . He says to wait til I’m 18 to be official with him and I agreed . But wait don’t judge me on here about the age this isn’t what’s important here . Anyways He acts like my boyfriend, he gives me everything , he makes time and effort for me. But he’s constantly texting other girls , when he sees them in the streets he wants to hola at them . We had an issue about that and got over it and he seems to do it again . He doesn’t respect my feelings and he’s always talking about we’re going to get married and that I’m his future wife . How Could I be If he’s hurting me by doing this . He knows it hurts me and I can’t change him. He says a man is going to be a man . I’m with him most likely everyday . But what am I doing that’s wrong .. does he not love me. Don’t i give him what he wants ? Am I not enough for him . I love this man , I got so attached , he made me like this . And He tells these girls that he’s single . When I ask him why , even I know we’re not together but we’re talking he just says he can’t claim me til I’m 18 and that I know I’m his , why should I stress .. he’s always asking me to fuck other girls too . And that he will come back to me and I told him I’m not a backup plan. Our bond is so strong it’s like it can’t break .. we laugh all the time . He’s like my bestfreind and I don’t want to lose him . I want him to be my future husband . Why can’t he just change his ways . Or will he change his ways when we’re official ? We’ve been talking for months and ever since then we’ve been with each other everyday

  • Breanna

    My boyfriend of eight years just got a job about two months ago. It’s out of town. I’ve only been seeing him one day a week. We have a two year old and a seven month old together. Anyway today something was different. I’ve been getting this terrible feeling he is talking to somebody. He has never cheated on me before. But we have had problems with him texting other women. Although it’s been almost a year since the last time I caught him. Well he came home last night. I live with my mother and he lives with his mother also. It took me a whole day to find a way to see him. He told me when I was halfway to his house that he did not want me to come. We were fighting. He thought I was cheating on him. I was almost there and the kids missed there daddy so I brushed him off. We got there and an hour had passed and he did not come out of the shop to go in the house to see me or the kids. It’s dark at this time. So I ran out there to him and he turned and had this terrible look In his eyes. Like he hated that I was there. I asked him why he was looking at me liked that and he said he was busy and didn’t have time to talk. So I went back in the house got the kids to sleep and ran back outside to him. He started screaming at me for no reason. He looked like he had lost a lot of weight within the last six days I have not seen him. Of course making me think maybe he is doing dope. Well he proceeded to tell me that he had told me not to come and did not have time for me. And now I’m in the house by myself crying wondering what happened to my loving man. I’m so heart broken. He has not treated me like this in a long time. I just wanted a kiss because I had missed him. Normally when he comes home for the one night he’s all over me and super happy. I just don’t understand what’s happening

  • Tabitha caldwell

    Hi my name is tabitha . i already knew that my ex really did,nt love me . because of the way my ex treats me. Yes i know that. So the only thing i can do now is to gone and move on now with my life now. And be strong now. Because its gonna be a day that i can fine me someone else thats gonna love me better then my ex did. So i dont have to ever worry any more now.

  • Laurie Post author

    I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers, for healing and growth. May you find a strong and healthy sense of self worth in the God who created you, instead of a man who can’t love you. May you find hope and joy, and may you Blossom into the woman God created you to be.


  • Shirelon Wilkerson

    I feel in love for the first time 20 yes ago and l never healed. After a bad relationship l asked Jesus to tell me were this hurt stemmed from…l ran into my first love again after 15 yrs.l realized l still loved him and l was holding on to that love. The lord let me go back to see l dnt do anything wrong. That if this man was for me he would have made it so. I know the truth is rbis.man dosent love me and now as much as it hurts Jesus can begin to heal me! I m so heartbroken but so greatful the lord is with me.l m so hurt pls pray for me…that l move past this and truly heal.

  • Lindsey Kerce

    My husband and I have been married 8 years. There was a time that I knew even in the middle of fights that he wanted me and didnt want to lose me. Today I heard him say ” sometimes I cant stand you but I have no where else to go”. A part of me wants to scream and try to get him to realize how it hurts to hear that from him. However this isnt new information to me. That still voice you mentioned has been talking to me and I have not wanted to face it. Im praying for strength to do what God wants. If I am what he says I am and treat him so badley, I no longer want to be the one that brings him misery. I love him enough to let him go. It is scary to think that he could be happier with someone else. So my emotions are up and down. But I can no longer ignore the signs that my husband hates me. I miss God. Sometimes my spirit screams for Him. I wish I knew how to feel Gods comfort and accept His love. I need Him.
    Sincerely LK

    • Kiara

      You can feel him, you can feel his comfort. God has never left you and never will. I know what you frel but Im here to tell you it gets better. Focus on your smile, focus on getting you back together. That was the hardest thing for me to do, was focus on myself, I wanted to focus on him so badly and tell him but for what. For it to be dismissed and for me to fight with myself. Go to God and begin to tell him everything and cry out, open your heart and be vulnerable to God like you were that man and watch how he takes off inside you. He will give you peace he will give you a smile, he will make your days back joyous. Let anything that hinders you go and focus on you. Stay encouraged

  • Serena

    We dated 19 yrs ago. Feb, 2016. We connected on Face Book. 2 mths into our relationship I found out he had secretly taken pics of me and sent them to his friend saying horrible things about my body.afterward he accused me daily of cheating on him. He would smoke meth and watch for days, completely ignoring me until I would go bathe, then he would sneak his phone under the door and video me bathing. When I found the phone and video I asked why? He said because I was on cam for my ex lol. The video shows a closed shower curtain, and me peeking out once when I heard a thug outside the door. He left me after I text an ex boyfriend asking about his knee surgery. To him that was proof I was cheating. It’s been 5 mths and I am finally seeing that he is possibly Narcissistic. He said he sent the photos and said those things because I MADE HIM MAD. I caused him to act this way. Therefore I was to blame. He will not speak to me or see me now for any reason. I am almost positive he videoed me as his proof the breakup was not his fault, I was to blame. Leaving me looking back seeing when he was tired of the relationship..he started pushing me away so I would leave and he could be the victim. It took a yr. I am hurt still but more confused than anything.

  • Aneisha Floyd

    i needed this so much , im not sure how to follow up with my relationship after reading this , but i will first start by taking some tyime to get to know myself better . Before this relationship i wasnt clingy , or needy , but my partner was emotionally abusive and controlling . Told me i never needed friends or family , so i isolatated myself from them to be the woman he needed, but everything i did , he never . He never let go of his friends , or family, nor isolated himself from anything . He likes things this way, and now i have turned into an emotionally , sensitive woman just constantly searching for his approval and love. Last time i broke up with him he threatened too kill himself , he locked himself in his home for days , and refused to continue his daily life if i would have left. I dont know why he’s so scared to loose me, but doesnt seem to respect me or cherish me majority of the time .

  • Karin

    I have been with my husband for 19 years married to him for 15 years everything was ok somewhat we had are ups an downs . We have 3 kids together. He use to do everything with us. He made time for his kids. About 2 years now his been acting differently. Watch’s porn a lot. Goes on dating sites . Lies to me about the websi deletes them. Lies to me about calling an texting another girl. When I ask him about it he tells me he’s tired of me telling him how to talk to his not a kid. He’s never done this . He works on the road hotel to hotel . Last couple months he wanted me to go with him . Now he wants us to move there. He blames me yells at me even gets made when i talk to him . Feels like I can’t do nothing right. I Do all the house work an outside work an try to keep a job an plus take care of the house with all I have to do if I don’t do what he ask he gets really mad . He runs off when he comes home on weekends talks to a 17 year old little girl that does all his habits. He only touches me when he wants . If he has to stay with me he’ll either sleep all day or play on the phone. He says he loves me an wants me with him but sure don’t seem like it. I don’t know what to do . Does he love me an want to be with me or is this just a mind game he’s playing

  • Nana

    I recently told my husband we need to work on communication because I was tired of not knowing how he felt. I always been alone with my son. He thought providing for the family was enough. I don’t trust him. He said he tried but he didn’t. He told me he was with me because of our son. That broke my heart. I ask him if he still love me . He said no. I wanted to cry but I was calm and accept the answer he give me. I have no job and I’m going to school to become MA. I feel scared because i can’t just leave without having a job.

    • Nishat

      Dear sister
      You are lucky that your husband told you the truth . Ask him to support you till u get a job. Have faith and confidence in yourself and Almighty you will definitely find someone better .